I've had a crazy week, and I just want to relax. So I decided to write a kind of funny, random post. At least, it will be funny to me.
So without further ado, reasons why I can't have kids (yet).
1. I haven't finished Ina May's Guide to Childbirth.
2. If I went into labor, I'd be thinking more about arguing with the OB/nurse about letting me have a natural birth than actually having the kid.
3. I would force my child to eat when he/she wasn't hungry, so that I could breastfeed in public.
4. I haven't convinced my fiance that he would be in charge of diaper duty.
5. My cat doesn't like to share.
6. No one has sent me a copy of the parenting manual yet.
7. My mother-in-law (to be) would probably move into my house as soon as she heard I was going to have a child.
8. I just told the census that only two people live in my house.
9. My camera can't hold how many pictures I would take of my growing belly and the child once born.
10. I would be more interested reading mommy blogs, abortion rights blogs, and other blogs than spending quality time with a child.
11. I haven't decided if my child will be bilingual, trilingual, quad-lingual, or just bajillion-lingual.
12. I would have too much fun taking my child to rallies and marches.
13. I'm waiting for tantrums to come with an "on/off" switch.
14. I'm also waiting for men to produce breastmilk so I don't have to do all the night feedings.
15. I've yet to find a company which offers a return policy if I change my mind.
16. I would spend all my money on babywearing wraps because I can't pick a favorite fabric.
17. I don't think people want to read me tweet about poopy diapers and puke.
18. I don't want to tweet about poopy diapers and puke.
There you go! Some of the reasons I can't have kids.
Reflecting on Privilege
2 years ago